The Mothership

As the new year begins I have some things that I'm trying to change...I guess we'll call them resolutions.  Sure... I think resolutions in years past have given me a sense of things that I haven't accomplished or sustained.  They give me a false sense of identity.  I become fixated on what needs to be taken out of my life instead of what I should be pouring into my life.  When I focus on what Christ wants for me and my family, then I focus more on his image in me.  I was made in his image which means I have Him in me which means I can't be so bad...it means part of me is good. One of the things I am focusing on this year will be slowing down and taking the time to enjoy the kids...those HARD moments with the kids.  I realize how fortunate I am that Tim and I have made allowances for me to stay home.  And I really have loved my young kids...oh I have loved it so.  But as they get older and need more independence, I find myself having too many o...

I'm not sure I would have been happy with either outcome of this years election.  I've heard lots of comments like: " it's the lesser of two evils....we've had corrupt presidents in the past and lived through it...abortion shouldn't even be on the ballot... " and on and on the remarks for one side or the other go.  All the while each person trying to feel better about this situation.  All the while putting others down for not choosing their same side.  These past couple months I feel as if kind, intellectual conversation is on the demise and that corruption, money, and power seem to be at the forefront of everything.  And in the midst of all this awful talk, compassion is hard to find.  Wednesday, everything I was reading or hearing from friends put my heart through the ringer.  I didn't get much accomplished besides dinner made and cleaned up.  I wasn't just sad for the outcome, but for how people AFTER the outcome were treating each other. ...

I was supposed to have surgery today... but God had bigger plans for me.  Bigger plans than I could have ever dreamed. They always say healing happens, and when it happens it is usually not just for physical healing but for some kind of transformation...well, He's been working on more than my wrist. About a year ago I tore cartilage in my wrist...opening salsa...I know, true story.  Who does that ?  Anyway, it became so painful that I went to a doctor and after a few tests decided that surgery was the next step.  The doctor left it up to me as to when I should have surgery...having an 18 month old and surgery don't really mix.  So I waited...talked to God a bit...waited... and the pain increased. I could no longer do a push-up, open a can of beans, garden, clean the house, shake an inhaler for my son, lift my toddler into his car seat, crab-walk across a gym, pretend to be a horse for my kids to ride, sleep through the night without waking in pain...on a...

We are in the midst of a parenting class..."Loving your kids on purpose".  We've only had the introduction and it has already changed me, or at least been the tipping point and answer to my prayers. Parenting has been somewhat difficult for me lately.  I have not handled the simplest of situations gracefully.  I have been asking for God's forgiveness and to please change my heart...make it new again.  Help me to see the loving way to discipline these kids instead of yelling...almost...every...day. I believe my heart has been opened and my prayers are being answered.  This week just seems a little lighter, a little less stressed.  A little more lovely. So, I am making a goal...can I go, 5 days without screaming at my kids?  I think I can because I have done it three days so far.  Even with the fighting, hair pulling, and tantrums, I feel like this week I have responded better than ever before.  PLEASE let this continue.  I'm not say...

It's been long since told, but we are pregnant again!!!  And to tell you the truth, I am pretty excited.  No, really, I am...at least I am now:)  It came as a bit of a shock, but I am very excited.  Infact, I was just looking at someones facebook page and they were cuddling with their baby, and I had a longing for cuddles...a longing?  Really?  How can this be?  My little girl is only a bit over a year and I'm already ready for another baby.  I can't really say that I was ready for the news when I found out though. We had Carolyn's first birthday party.  To my surprise, as we were opening gifts, I thought that maybe I had started my period...false alarm.  But that got me thinking...when WAS my cycle supposed to start?  I am fairly regular but, I didn't think much of it and the week went on.  Finally on the following Friday it occurred to me that I had not started yet and that I may actually be pregnant.  I was running wi...

Tim and I recently had a child-free morning, thanks to my parents.  On this early morning we were able to drink coffee without a worry of it being spilled, go back for a second cup, walk around naked....(Just kidding;).  We also spent the whole morning whilst drinking our coffee, on the front porch talking for almost 2 hours.  This is a VERY rare occasion.  Not just because of children, but life and all the distractions it holds.  Which got us talking about some goals we decided we wanted to instil as a family.  We tried to make goals that are realistic and attainable, yet challenging. So here they are: All snacks must be portioned out (No bag or jar eating)...and at least 15 minutes between snacks.  This goal is mainly for Tim and I because the kids are growing, they don't have any obesity issues that I'm aware and Tim and I tend to snack after the kids have gone to bed. No T.V. watching 2 nights a week .  Tim and I are so tired by the end of...

With Luke's new vocabulary questions have come.  He doesn't even stop to listen to the answer I am giving him and he's already asking another.  He also makes the most random comments and remarks out of nowhere.  Here are just some of my favorites: While watching a show about dinosaurs, "Mommy, what dat species?" "No, dat silly mommy.  I'ma sillwe monkey." "dah-hah, me feet stinky!" while running to an air-show, "Me LOVE see aiw-panes fly! Phshuuuuuu on a phone call with Mammie discussing what he saw at the air-show, "Me see jets, aiw-panes, racie cars, super guys, helwecopters, and SPACESHIP!  Phshuuuuuu!" if he seems absent mindedabout anything he snickers a little smile and says, "Ha, me forgot!" like it was such a surprise to him. after a long walk with with G-pa he came back and said, "Mammie, me walk weallwee farrr.  My legs so tired!" and my favorite: whilst playing or being corrected...

Luke has recently really gotten into saying his prayers at night.  I have tried to compile some of our dialog during prayers.  They usually start out this way: Me: You want to say prayers? Luke: MmmHhmmm Me: Let's do it then. Luke: Dear Godt, kay-you for me, kay-you for mommy, Cece, kay-you for Daddy, kay-you made me and my torpedos. Amen and another time... Luke: Dear Godt, kay-you for making trees, and gorillas, and my family...AAAAAANNNNDDD my CARs another... Luke: Godt, kay-you for mommy, daddy, Cece, and kay-you make me, and Dave and Jess, and Dave and Ho-hawk (mo-hawk).  Amen.  Dave do that again? another... Luke: Dear Godt, kay-you for make me, my house, my food, my cool house, and for my toads, yeah toads...they say croak, me see toads morrow? Amen. another one...(this one really gets me right there ya know) Luke: kay-you for my mommy, my daddy, Cece, and...., and..., and...Mommy you so beautiful:) As you can tell, prayers are a compil...

This is somewhat of a continuation of Carolyn's Birth.  This is about when Luke came to meet her at the hospital for the first time.  This is a memory that will forever be fresh in my memory.  It touches my heart every time I think of it and almost makes my eyes tear up with delight and sadness at the same time.My mother warned me how upset she was when she came home with Sam, at how BIG Emma looked and was no longer her baby. Well, this played somewhat the same way, but in a slightly different, emotional way.  Let's go back to the day before...or couple of months before Carolyn arrived.  Now, don't get me wrong I was VERY excited to have a new baby and especially have a girl.  I've always dreamed about how close I would be with my kids, but especially my daughter.  There would be a special closeness.  Little did I know how CLOSE I would become with my little man.  He is all kinds of emotion...but he is a part of me.  Raising him h...

Carolyn Frances Thielen is finally here!  She is so beautiful...but then again I'm very biased. This all happened very differently than Luke.  Luke came early, but very stubbornly.  Which of course is his personality; always rushing, but under his own terms.  Carolyn came two days after my due date through induction, but she came as smoothly as any birth could.  This too, is her personality; calm and easy going, but not without making a statement first. We dropped Luke off at Patti & Chris's house Monday night after spending a whole day together as our last day of a family of three.  We did whatever Luke wanted to do and even took him to EnterTRAINment junction.  I had never been away from Luke for more than a day so I felt sentimental.  I tried to go to bed early, because we needed to leave for the hosiptal by 2:30a.m..  I laid awake thinking about how different we would be as a family and many questions entered my thoughts. ...

So it has been about a year since I posted anything!!!  That's amazing.  I guess I've been a little busy this past year, having a new baby and all.  So, in the next posts, I will just be trying to recount some of my memories from the past year.  They probably won't be sequential, because I can't remember more than two things at a time anymore.  Sorry for the sabbatical:)

So yesterday, for the first time ever, I prayed to ask God to heal someone...IN PUBLIC.  It was a very humbling experience. I have always been worried that I won't pray well on behalf of God; that I would be a terrible example of public prayer. It's certainly not like in the movies where you see people speak in tongues or have an immediate, miraculous epiphany or healing.  The message was about stepping out on our "Faith".  The Pastor asked people to stand who had some type of physical pain or ailment.  Right before he had mentioned this, I had asked God to show me how to be a little more selfless and step out on my faith.  Well, so be it, two ladies stood up right next to me.  It was like God was saying, "OK, here you go.  Now don't be a wuss and punk out on me." So, naturally I felt as if I needed to do something.  The Pastor made it very clear that this was not to be a performance of speaking in tongues or any kind of show; this was to be to ...

I've caught the bug...I'm preggo again (and not just hungry for the canned pasta sauce).  I'm actually fo' real pregnant!  AHHHHHH!!!!  What have I done? No seriously, I am very excited for this new baby.  I LOOOOOOOVE Babies.  I love their smell, their wrinkly bodies, the breast feeding, the rocking, the singing, hmmmmmm, need I go on? However, right from the start this baby is already different.  I feel more nauseous than I did when I carried Luke (maybe it's a girl?).  My energy level is nil.  I'm not sure if that's because I have Luke to chase around this time?  I was chasing around 12 1st graders before, so it can't be that much different.  I have little to no appetite.  I haven't gained any weight (which is peculiar, considering I do this even when I'm not pregnant).  Poor Tim comes home from a day full of work and swoops in to make it all better (he's the bestest!). We found out the day after I got sick in my exerc...

I LOVE spending time with my husband.  I mean who could be more fun?  He just gets me and my humor and vice-verse (I think :/).  However, I think we have a conversation that goes like this quite often: Me: "Where are you going?" Tim: "I don't know, downstairs I guess." Me: as I say with a pouty face "ooookk..." Tim: "Do you have a better idea." Me: "No, but I want to spend time with you.  We don't spend enough time together." Tim: "Tell me what you want to do!" Me: and now we're yelling at each other, "I don't know!  I JUST WANT TO SPEND TIME WITH YOU!" We usually end up doing something, and sometimes nothing.  If you know anything about Tim, you know he's fairly energetic and needs A LOT of exercise.  Think of the most athletic, active person you know and then double that...that's about how much exercise Tim needs.  We bike together, hike together, play soccer, kayak, canoe, swim, r...

After much thinking, hemming, and hawing, I decided blogging would become my new years resolution.  I am going to attempt to write as much as I can, as cleverly as I can, and maybe someday, I'll inform someone of this little blog thingy. There is so much pressure... pressure to edit correctly... pressure to be funny... pressure to...to..to...think of new things! IT'S SO MUCH PRESSURE! Enjoyment should be the name of the game, so that's what I'm going to do.  Enjoy my writing, I think I'm funny anyway:) I hope to include my friends, family and those not so friendly (maybe) in many anecdotes.  I've always enjoyed writing in my journal, but never for others before.  So, here it goes.  My best foot forward!  I...WILL...PERSEVERE! This blog will certainly challenge me...but I'm always up for a good challenge.  Especially one that no one knows about and I can be my own critic. So, if you've stumbled across this, bear with me.  Hope the nex...