The Release We All Need

 My stories and posts from last year at this time keep popping up on my news feeds and the only thing I can think of is "Remember how you felt? You felt so trapped."

I was happy. I was joyful. But I was internally exhausted. Trying to be all the things and all the places for all the people. Not that they MADE me do any of it...I said yes to that all on my own and I take responsibility for that. I have a hard time with setting boundaries for myself. If there is anything that has helped me along in my healing it is my husband's ability to cross-reference and say, "maybe that's too much." It doesn't mean I always listen to him, because I have different desires, gifts, and a different threshold than him. But all the same, he is a great sounding board.

The memories I have of those times from last year were filled with laughs and goodness. But I can feel the anxiety, stress, and pain welling up in my chest even now of how it felt. Always saying, "I just need to make it to ____ and then things will calm down." And you know what. It never did. 

I am at the beginning of a journal devotional a friend of mine wrote. She asked us to, "think of the word, RELEASE and think of a tree and the same word...what comes to mind?"

A tree is strong and there is beauty in it's strength, but is not limited to this one job. There is vast beauty encapsulated in it's purpose! It provides shade for others on hot days...purifies our air...is a climbing apparatus for young daredevils...visual peace and distraction for those in need...and in my opinion shows it's true fanfare of beauty in the fall when it floods us with its majestic change of vibrant colors. A tree knows why it has been created and performs it's duties to it's fullest. 

It draws an interesting picture that in the RELEASE is where we see the beauty in the tree. The tree knows it has done it's job well, and now in order to protect itself, it must release something that has been life-giving and good. In order for it to survive and continue to perform, it must let go.

In all my memories, and busyness of last year I remember, those things WERE good. They were life-giving, fruit-producing, and made great impact. And yet, I didn't know I needed to release some of the good things to make room for what God was truly calling me; or changing in me for this season. Letting go and saying no is hard for me. I can place all of the responsibilities of "I NEED to" on myself and then all of a sudden the "I NEED to's" become the "I have to's" which leads to a mountain of stress, resentment and obligation. 

When in fact it is in the release that we take pause and breath to reevaluate where our energy can be a blessing. Using our gifts and talents, we take pause and see where oxygen needs to be made. When I am in a moment of taking pause I need to fill myself in other ways. For me, that is mostly through quality time, worship and scripture. It is in scripture I find life and teaching of what is true. It empowers me by instruction, giving me the strength to take the right direction and into deeper connection with him. We can fully be his servant in maturity and prepared to fulfill any assignment God gives us because we have released the things God doesn't need us to hold on to. It is with discernment and the filter of the Holy Spirit that the true beauty of RELEASE happens. 

We release the unnecessary for the necessary to be fully shown. In the letting go we are protecting the nature of our hearts and minds and also making space and pause for greater assignment. And then after you release, it is there the real responsibility begins. Where are you to go from here? What new things can you say yes to? What boundaries do you need to set, and stick to? What new things can you say no to so that you can fulfill your assignment, because there will certainly be distractions along the way. Good distractions, but yet still distractions that pull you from your innate purpose. 

Then in the realization of where your full attention should be, take up that responsibility and own it. Move forward in the responsibility like only you can because YOU have been assigned and you have released in order to do so. Don't sit idly by and watch your purpose hang in the air. Snatch it up and do it!

For me, as I look back over my life I see how different seasons have had different purposes. But for me, I have also looked back and seen ares that were not necessarily in line with my purpose. 

Right now there are many of us struggling with a lot of stressors. I know we have had a lot of "extra time" because of the world's circumstances. But what about that time? Where can you release so you can be protected? Find the refuge in God, look for his guidance, and then make your next move.

Don't be pulled in different directions or worried about a thing. Be saturated in prayer throughout each day, offering your faith-filled requests before God with overflowing gratitude. Tell him every detail of your life. Phil. 4:6 TPT