Who They Are Becoming

I walk in to the kitchen and find myself in the middle of a conversation between Tim and Carolyn. Even though the boys are loud, and honestly myself too, Tim and Carolyn seem to be having a very intimate conversation before school. As I'm running through all the tasks at hand that need to be accomplished before they each walk out the door, Tim finds the space between the minutes to make them count. The boys are jabbering on and on about bodily functions and nonsense words whilst tying shoes. Meanwhile Tim and Carolyn could be in their own booth at a cute diner fully engrossed in their discussion. I'm fortunate enough that this is not the first time this scene has played. He loves talking with her...with all the kids. His time is limited and his words are few. But something the kids and I have no doubt about is that most words he speaks are weighed. Tim doesn't say much without first thinking it over. Here is what I hear between the chaos:

T: Do you know how much I love your mom?

C: Well, I mean I can kinda guess with how much you're always hugging on her.

T: (smile/laughing) When you find your husband he needs to be better than me.

C: Well, that's kinda hard because you're kinda great.

T: Well, I'm praying that your husband is even better than me in all the ways that I am great and better than me in all the ways I am not. There's lots of times I make mistakes with your mommy and that will probably happen with you and your husband too. But your husband is going to be better at a lot of things than I am.

C: like dancing...

We pray for our children, but the influence doesn't stop there. We take the time to pray for their future husband and future wife. We pray that they find a person that understands their love languages. That they find a person that isn't in it for the fairy tale that our culture leads us to believe we SHOULD have or deserve. But the kind of spouse God has called them to be. We pray for the kind of spouse our child will be. For a spouse that is TRULY their best friend and willing to come to the relationship 100%. We declare attributes of what their future spouse will embody, including the foundation of keeping God first in their marriage. IN a culture that tells us what we SHOULD DESERVE we miss the opportunities to see what can be given to us if we aren't preemptive. God answers prayers and he certainly answers the prayers we pray over our children. I have seen it in time and my children are young! Changing a society begins at home. If you can take the ground and put in the hard work now to see fruit for the kingdom, then why not take action now? Our children are looking to us to set the bars and see where their worth lays. In Bob Goff's words, let's celebrate and declare who our children are becoming...including what they will look like in their marriage.