Loose Ends

The amount of things I have unfinished at the moment is unreal. I don't usually let things get this out of hand (or what I think is out of hand) ...but April/May happened and I haven't been able to catch up. Or is that my reality?!?! Am I really as organized as I'd like to think?!?! My desk would say otherwise. Sometimes, as I walk through my house, all I can see are the reminders of all the unfinished projects and loose ends. 

Does your mind ever wander into mindless banter? And then as you begin to start your day accomplishing Mount "whatever" you trail from project to project and child's need back to project, accomplishing maybe only one thing?!?! I mean as I sit here trying to type out my thoughts I am couponing, reading a devotional, looking at my calendar because I never got back to that person about that date, birthday shopping, making breakfast, and my to-do list for today.

I am distracted...

I walk from room to room and these are just some of the loose ends not yet tied up:

• the recipe from the cookbook I wanted to try (never tried it or even finished looking through the book but there it sits)
• the dishwasher...
• fill the dishwasher...but wait I'm low on soap
• and the dusting rag - I see it as I'm looking for soap - I haven't dusted in.....
• oh the book I'm reading - but not reading - I should put that away
• ugh! who put that lego there! I really need to reorganize those legos and get those shelves built for them to place all their creations
• how many empty amazon boxes do we have on the table?!?!
• my teaching bag(s) that hold all the things that need to be properly filed and put away so I can easily find them next year
• the basket of papers from school which spilled out as I walked by because it is so full
• filling important papers
• paying bills
• the laundry that sits clean in the hamper for 5 days now
• the laundry that is being rewashed from sitting in the washer overnight
• the toy shelf with toys that are not in demand because the kids have aged out of them
• clothes to be mended
• adorable art that needs to be stored
• leftover pieces from craft projects that no one knows what to do with because they probably only fit the project we did but can't bring myself to throw them away
• the miscellaneous knickknacks that are of uber importance to my children - but could disintegrate with the touch of a wet palm.

My list could go on and on and my things unfinished will go on forever.  There are always things. Kids or not. Sometimes when I feel the breadth of all these loose ends I have to remember that at the other end it'll all be fine.  That at one end of the string God has me in his hands and I can breathe deeply and forget about the unfinished things and focus on the important unfinished things...like my children.

I was cutting peonies the other day to bring inside because...well peonies.  Whenever I cut them I have to hold them right at the base of where the stem and petals meet and give a really good shake.  Because underneath all those loose petals are working ants.  The ants work to spread the beautiful petals apart and find solace inside the safety of the petals. 

As I shook the last one I realized I am both the ant and the petals.  God has me in his firm grip to shake me off and bring me back to my original beauty and Identity in Him. Not the emotionally, unfocused, tyrant barging through a never ending list of to-dos. Those do not define me.  Also, I am the ant opening God's beauty and petals for all to see.  To be a fragrance so bold and yet soft that none can deny the aroma of the Father. I need to make sure my work is focused on Him and not the works themselves.

Happy Summer!