What You've Taught Me

To my friend whose life has changed since Thanksgiving...hearing your voice speak THAT word...

such an ugly word; chemo...cancer. And they both mean the same thing essentially...poison in the body.

And yet, might I say, you are NOT changed for the worst.

This disease is only that, a disease.  You have NOT let it define you! I will never know a day in your shoes, and nor will I ever pretend to know what your mind, heart, and body have been through. But there are some things you have taught me these past 7 months.

You have taught me...

• there is absolutely NO excuse to not getting my laundry folded...not even the fitted sheets.
• my excuses for NOT exercising carry no weight...they are just empty words.
• what humility looks like...accepting and receiving help is not easy - at least I know not for you and me.
• how smart and clever you are. I knew it before, but the amount of information you keep in your head - even after children and chemo - is astounding.
• that children are constant no matter what you are going through...their joys, pains, needs for guidance, and of course needs for mom - they NEVER leave! You can always depend on children to keep it real.
• the word healthy has a much different meaning than we thought - it carries great responsibility and is a different course for each person.
• how above all things come relationships.  Not relationships with strings attached...but those forged with forgiveness, unconditional love, and boundless time.
• how eating is not just mindless anymore, but with purpose.  And yet, to also be rational because we are living LIFE. 
• that TRUST in the Lord only comes from making room from Him in your heart.
• that my first and EVERY reaction should be to lean on God and the support he has given. Your faith and love has grown leaps and bounds and your endurance for the kingdom of God is long-winded. 
• that FEARS can be overcome.  They are just that...fears.  Longstanding, generational, decades long fears can be cast aside all because of JESUS! And they deserve no more recognition. They do NOT belong in your story.  

I will never forget all the months before the day you called me. The months I prayed to know why my friend who used to sprint past me was now third or fourth in the race (was it just because she had 4 kids?!?! and in her 30's?!?!) 

That day you were changed...and everyone that has any tie to you.  And yet it seems like such a separate lifetime.  So much has changed, but not for the worst. I don't believe God did this to you, but I most certainly believe that you follow so strongly as a servant of Christ that YOU have consulted HIM in everything, trusted in all trials, and had faith in all his goodness that he has used you as a LIGHT among such awful darkness.

"Strong roots are the faith from which grows the undeniable understanding that everything in life, the good and the bad, is a God given opportunity to stand in the light. Everything." 

- Tyler Perry

So today...I raise a glass of wine to you - wine without the bad stuff - and sit in admiration for all you push me to do, eager to stand in the light among you, my friend.

"Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him.  Your roots will grow down into God's love and keep you strong."  

Ephesians 3:17

Your roots have grown deeper and my, how strong you have become...fear has no hold on you and is nowhere near your destiny for God's Kingdom. I know that not every thought is positive and that not every day is easy because we are still here on Earth and you share your concerns with me, but boy, you have found so much joy and live with so much more abandoned limits than you once did. Worry does not consume you anymore. 

And ladies & gents...you'll be happy to know she is FLYING past me in bootcamp class running up hills in the heat even after a 5 mile run/walk BEFORE the class...burpees for days and might be able to press more in weight than me...and I wouldn't have it any other way.

 This is at the Flying Pig 5K this year in May...the last mile we ran was an 8:11 pace! Aaaaaaand I almost lost my breakfast that morning. But Tori set the pace, we talked the whole way and I'm sure that'll never happen again for me, but I KNOW it will for her.

This is a favorite song of hers at the moment (and mine):

The Break Up Song 

So proud to know you, friend.

“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.”

‭‭Philippians‬ ‭4:6-7‬